My other dog's routines were modified.
A month after my senior dog passed away, my small dog and I are still mourning his loss. However, life is continuing well as we changed our daily routine to fit our lifestyle.
In case it's helpful, below are the topics covered in this post:
A Need For Change
My 15-year-old black lab mix, Shadow, died suddenly late afternoon on 28 November 2022. It was difficult losing my first dog. I sobbed frequently for the first week. Although the tears flow less, there are random moments when I miss Shadow terribly.
My small dog, Rascal, also cried frequently for several weeks. I assume he cried every time I wiped globs of thick liquid drops from his eyes.
Rascal and I are still mourning, but we are making adjustments that work for us both.
For the first five days after Shadow died, we tried sticking with our old routine. Many online articles suggested this was important for other dogs in a household. It let them know that life would continue as it was, just with one less dog in the family.
Maybe this works for other dogs, or perhaps dogs that were not present when and where the other dog died. However, sticking with our daily routine as it was when Shadow was alive did not work for Rascal.
At first, change was difficult for Rascal. For example, we rarely did (or have never done) the following without Shadow:
Mealtimes
Treat times
Play times
Walks in a park
Trips to a pet-friendly store
However, a change in our daily routine helped him adjust to being a single dog. There are a few things that have returned to normal, like his mealtimes, but changing things even for a short while proved to be helpful as we adjust and get through our mourning phase.
Meal and Treat Times
For weeks, Rascal would not eat alone. I never ate breakfast, but I started eating a little something so that he would eat his food. If I or my parents were not eating, Rascal did not approach his food bowl.
Three days ago, Rascal felt comfortable enough to eat alone while I was focused on doing household chores for my Mom who recently fractured her ribs. It was a feel-good moment knowing that Rascal finally got to a point where he would eat when he was hungry without someone else having to eat with him.
Rascal refused treats for about a week after Shadow's death. The week after, he would eat a treat every few days. Fortunately, he has accepted a treat daily this past week.
One treat that I have yet to give Rascal is cheese. I used to wrap Shadow's medicine in sliced cheese every afternoon at 4 p.m. He took Galliprant daily for his joint pain, one of several challenges my senior dog faced.
When Shadow received his medicine, I would give Rascal a piece of cheese to be fair. I tried continuing the cheesy treat at the same time after Shadow died, but Rascal refused it. After several days of failing, I decided to stop the cheesy treat, at least for a while.
Play Times
Before Shadow died, both dogs played together most of the time. I also played with them, but we were often in the same room together as I played with one or both dogs. We mostly play fight. Rascal also loved being chased around a room. Rarely would the dogs play with toys or other items.
For over a week after Shadow died, Rascal would not play. I tried to engage in play the way I did in times past and in new ways, but Rascal was not feeling it for a while.
Eventually, he started to play fight with me once again. It did not last longer than a few minutes, but it was better than not playing at all.
When we arrived at my Mom's house before Christmas, Rascal and I had longer play sessions than in times past. It was a lot of fun! We primarily play fight, and sometimes I would chase him around a room.
One day, I found a soccer ball in Mom's backyard. I figured it came from her new neighbor's kids, but I played with it for a while before tossing it over the fence back into their backyard.
Rascal chased the soccer ball while I kicked it around. He has never shown interest in balls despite Shadow's fascination with tennis balls. On this day, however, Rascal was fascinated with the soccer ball.
During our walk at a park yesterday morning, Rascal picked nuts from the ground and dropped them in front of my feet to kick. I guess because of their round sizes, he believed they were like miniature balls. Our walk was more enjoyable yesterday because we had fun doing so.
Rascal does not know this, but Shadow used to do the same thing to me when he was a puppy. Shadow would find a nut, small stone, or abandoned ball and drop it at my feet for me to kick it. My walk with Rascal yesterday morning reminded me of the walks when Shadow was a young puppy. My heart was filled with so much joy.
Rascal will not touch the balls in the house (they were all originally Shadow's before I adopted Rascal), so I will have to buy him his own when I head out to take care of errands tomorrow.
Walks in a Park
We did not walk at the park as often this past year with Shadow's increased mobility issue. Rascal would put up a fight if we left the house without Shadow. We would walk in the park, but only when Shadow was able to go with us and rest at a picnic spot that I would set up for him.
For a few weeks after Shadow died, Rascal and I would go to the park daily. Rascal would not walk far, freezing in place after moving ten to twenty feet away from my SUV.
Eventually, we would walk further before he froze in place. Every time he froze, Rascal would whine and ask to be carried. I am probably a horrible dog owner because I always obliged. I would carry him back to the SUV.
Last Thursday, Rascal never froze nor whined. We were able to walk a great distance at the park. There were moments of hesitation when he would stop and check his surroundings, but he continued walking when I said, "OK, let's keep going."
Our walks since then have been pleasant with fewer moments of hesitation on his part. It felt great to walk at a steady pace to burn off energy and clear the mind. However, this was at a park unfamiliar to Rascal back in my hometown.
We did not walk today because I am feeling ill following my visit to Mom's house (my Mom's house makes me sick, literally), but we will try to walk again tomorrow morning. It would be interesting to see if the walk is pleasant or if the park by our house reminds him too much of our past walks with Shadow.
Trips to a Pet-Friendly Store
Before Shadow's mobility issue worsened, we used to visit various pet-friendly stores on the weekends. In our current town, this meant a trip to one or more of the following:
PetSmart
Petco
Half Price Books
Michaels
Hobby Lobby
Tractor Supply
When I got tired of visiting some of our local stores, we would make a trip to Austin to visit a greater selection of dog-friendly stores. The Domain was a shopping district Shadow loved to hang out at.
Unfortunately, Rascal was not comfortable at stores. It was easier for him in the past because of Shadow. When Rascal became fearful or anxious, he just crawled under Shadow's stomach for safety.
We have only visited pet stores since Shadow died, but Rascal's fear and anxiety were apparent. He would whine or scream and make a run for the exit.
I do not know if what I did was right or wrong, but I would comfort Rascal with soft words and a scratch or pet. We would browse the store a while longer. It was my way of letting him know we were not leaving because he wanted to.
Most people would say that I was rewarding an unwanted behavior, but I do not believe it works that way with Rascal. Yes, speaking with a soft voice and scratching or petting Shadow rewarded unwanted behavior. I learned that quickly when Shadow was a puppy.
Rascal, on the other hand, is more likely to stop whining and calm down when treated like, well, a baby. This technique only works when he is fearful or anxious. Otherwise, a traditional correction or stern voice command would do the trick.
Despite whether I managed Rascal appropriately when he is feeling uneasy, he has gotten better this past week. Now when we enter a store, he will still let out a little whine, but he no longer makes a run for the exit.
On Christmas Eve, he actually browsed a Petco on his own. I let him lead as we walked down different aisles so he could look at the merchandise visible at his level. It was amazing to see Rascal show interest in things that he used to ignore.
I wonder if a part of behavior had to do with my emotional state that day.
The last time we went to this Petco was with Shadow last June. I remembered Shadow walking down the aisles, taking things off the shelves or hooks, and dropping them onto the floor. He would look back at me with a huge smile on his face and his tail wagging profusely. I swear Shadow enjoyed watching me put the merchandise back in place as I called him a "big dork."
Other Changes
Obviously with one less dog in our household, things were bound to change. However, there were other changes I did not expect, but I am pleased they happened.
Rascal is braver. As I mentioned earlier, he used to hide under Shadow when he was fearful or anxious. He still gets fearful and anxious, but he deals with it instead or finding a place to hide.
For example, Rascal fears children. In the past, he would run away from them and hide. Now if there are children around, he flinches and stands behind me. He does not try to run away anymore. He will not leave my side.
Staying close to me is also a new change. In the past, Shadow was my one loyal dog who stayed by my side no matter what. He followed me everywhere. If I went into another room without him, he waited outside the door until I returned.
Rascal did not follow me everywhere, especially when he felt afraid of something. For example, rain and thunder scares him. In the past, he would run to his small dog bed hidden in a corner of the house and hide under the covers.
After Shadow died, Rascal started following me everywhere. If I went into another room without him, he waited outside the door until I returned.
When we had thunderstorms a couple weeks ago, he stayed by my side. Rascal trembled with fear, but he refused to leave me. I comforted him with a blanket, toy, and headset streaming stringed instrumental music.
Rascal does not always stay by my side. If I am busy cooking, cleaning, or crafting, Rascal will take off and hang out on his own or in Dad's room. When I am doing something on my computer or watching TV, then he would join me.
After a week staying at my Mom's house for Christmas, we returned home where we left my Dad. Because we had not seen my Dad in a week, Rascal spent the night in Dad's room. I am happy Rascal cares about Dad, but it is tough to go to sleep and wake up alone nowadays. I always had Shadow at least to keep me company.
Otherwise, Rascal is stuck to me like glue. As soon as he heard me move when I woke up this morning, he ran in to greet me. He has been by my side since then. If I choose to craft later, he will likely head back to Dad's room and watch him play video games until I am done.
What's Next?
Yes, my small dog and I are still mourning the loss of my senior dog, but we are doing it together. We are still adjusting our daily routine to best fit our lifestyle. Things are not so bad because we still have each other.
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Thanks, and have a great day!
Simply Jelly Jam
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