These are just a few of the rules I must abide by when I visit my Mom.
It is not uncommon for a homeowner to set rules for their house. I thought I would share some of my Mom's household rules that I am expected to abide by whenever I visit her.
Below are just five rules that I am expected to abide by whenever I visit my Mom's house. I thought I would share a few of her rules in case they are rules you agree with, would like to adopt for your own household, or think is a tad bit strange.
In case it's helpful, below are the topics covered in this post:
1. DO remove your shoes upon entering the house.
2. DO NOT show up without prior notice or approval.
3. DO clean up after yourself and your pets.
4. DO NOT wash the dishes in the kitchen sink.
5. DO be respectful.
1. DO remove your shoes upon entering the house.
Taking off your shoes is customary in many cultures, and it is a rule my Mom expects me to abide by. Personally, I do not mind taking off my shoes indoors. I do the same in my own house. It means less mess to cleanup each day.
However, my Dad (her ex-husband) and I are the only one who abide by this rule. This is likely because we lived with her for years and know her likes and dislikes.
Mom periodically asks my nieces and nephews to remove their shoes when they are staying longer than a short visit. Otherwise, Mom does not ask anyone to remove their shoes. She mentally prepares herself to do a lot of cleaning after visitors leave her house.
2. DO NOT show up without prior notice and approval.
My Mom hates when someone shows up to her house unannounced or uninvited. She wants advanced notice when someone plans to visit her, especially if they will be going indoors.
Since she does not always ask visitors to remove their shoes, Mom wants to mentally prepare herself to do a lot of cleaning after they leave the house.
Mom also insists on cleaning before visitors arrive. It is important that all visitors, whether they are staying for a few minutes, hours, or days, are impressed by a squeaky-clean environment.
Mom feels that the house must be prepared for guests whether it is family, relatives, friends, or strangers visiting. Her image is important and what people think of her are important.
Everything must be in its proper place. Anything Mom considers unappealing must be put away so that it is out-of-sight. Everything must be spotless. Mom fears being negatively judged by others.
It angers her when someone shows up unexpectedly. She does not show her anger towards them. Mom acts pleasantly surprised, especially if it is family that stops by. However, she throws a verbal temper tantrum when visitors leave. She often calls them inconsiderate and selfish.
If I am in the house when there are unexpected visitors, and family always visits if Mom tells them I am there, then she takes her anger out on me by yelling about how I should know better than to just show up.
I learned long ago to never show up at my Mom's house. I will always check with her in advance even if I want to stop by for a couple minutes to drop off or pick up something from her house.
3. DO clean up after yourself and your pets.
To me, this seems like an obvious rule I am happy to abide by. Mom does not have pets of her own nor does she want a pet of any kind. Yet, it is kind of Mom to allow me and others to bring our pets when we visit. It only makes sense to clean up after yourself and your pets.
When I visit with my dogs, I sweep and vacuum daily. What I use to clean with varies from room-to-room.
For example, I am not allowed to vacuum the tile floors in the kitchen, dining, and living rooms. There is a dedicated broom in the garage for cleaning the kitchen and dining areas. There is a different dedicated broom in the hallway closet for cleaning the living room, hallway, and bathrooms.
I can, however, vacuum the same tile floors in the hallway and bathrooms. Why? Mom has tried to explain this to me, but I never understood what she was saying. As of now, your guess is as good as mine.
When I need to clean the dogs’ water and food bowls, I must wash the bowls and anything else I may use for my dogs in the guest bathroom. Mom keeps a travel sized bottle of dish soap and a roll of paper towels in the bathroom for me to use clean the dogs’ bowls with.
If I need to wash clothes, I cannot use her twenty-year-old washer and dryer. I would have to wait until I got my dirty laundry home or head to a laundromat in town.
Mom worries about the dog hair that clings to my clothes clogging her machines, and I really do not blame her for it. My senior lab-mix sheds a lot, and I am often hugging both of my dogs. Dog hair is a way of life for us, but it does not have to be so for my Mom.
4. DO NOT wash the dishes in the kitchen sink.
While I may be expected to clean the house regularly while I am visiting, I have been told repeatedly to never wash her dishes. I do not understand this rule since I always washed the dishes when I lived there years ago. Yet, Mom insists that nobody washes the dishes.
If someone waited to wash the dishes when Mom stepped out of the room, she would yell at everyone when she returned to find the sink empty, and dishes cleaned. Her verbal temper tantrum could last over an hour if she is angry enough.
I was raised to trust no one, so it is possible Mom still has a great deal of trust issues well into her senior years.
5. DO be respectful.
This is another obvious household rule. Every visitor/guest should respect the host/homeowner and their property. It is a kind gesture that is appreciated by everyone.
For me, this means abiding by all of Mom's house rules and paying her compliments. That is right. If I do not think to compliment Mom about something, anything, she will ask me to do so.
Compliments build Mom's self-esteem. It allows her to feel confident about herself and the positive image she shows off to everyone.
I have made it a point to give Mom a compliment each day I stay at her house. It is not hard to do since I know my Mom tries her best at everything.
It only becomes difficult when we have a disagreement about something, and I struggle to think of something positive to say. I do not like lying, so I may hurt her feelings when I cannot think of a compliment to give her on the whim after an argument.
My Thoughts
I am used to Mom's household rules set for me when I visit. There are a few things, like the rule about what parts of the tile floors I can vacuum, that are still unclear to me. Otherwise, her rules seem reasonable enough based on her beliefs.
What's Next?
With the end of the month approaching, I will start planning a design theme for my journal. Check back later this week or early next week to see what theme I went with!
Comment below to share the household rules you grew up with or the ones you set as a homeowner.
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Thanks, and have a great day!
Simply Jelly Jam
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